Divorce

My ex husband is getting divorced.

This does not surprise me.

He said he has no money, no car, yet he was e-mailing me from his iPhone.

This also does not surprise me.

He asked me to take the dog.  At first I wanted to.  I pictured having my baby dog back that loved me so much.

Then I realized the burden not to mention the added connection to my ex.  When I let him take the dog three years ago I said goodbye to the dog.  I don't need the added pressure and stress in my life of taking care of an elderly animal right now.

Maybe that's selfish but really I suspect the ex is just sucking me into his drama as usual.  I spent 11 years taking care of him.  I don't need to do anything for him now.

I am almost positive that my most recent ex has Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

I don't believe my ex-husband does,  yet he has many of the same qualities.

He has bi-polar disorder.  He was manic when I met him and pursued me and swept me off my feet with gifts and overwhelming emotion.  I felt drunk when I was around him.

He is incredibly selfish.  But it almost just seems like a case where his needs and wants are so overwhelming that he cannot put anyone else first.

He is not totally without empathy, though.  He is very emotional and I have seen him do kind things.  But he often uses people due to his selfishness.

He is desperate to be the center of attention.

He has false pride.  When he's manic he has delusions of grandeur.  And he always has fantasies of greatness.

He is extremely dependent but does not resent the person he's dependent on.  He was always very effusively grateful and constantly telling me how much he loved me.

He wanted to get his way and was manipulative but not abusive and never intentionally hurtful to me.  

So, I'm not a trained professional, obviously.  But somehow I just know he wasn't NPD and I strongly feel my most recent ex was.